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What’s up with me? uh… nothing. Just posting a new Friday Telecast, the shows where we 3-way Skype at each other with topical subjects. This one’s the first of the Skype recordings since Matt upgraded the studio gear. No more shitty phones! Wow, I’m glad that’s over.
FRIDAY TELECAST 6 – RIPPING CHICKENS
This show, we start off with the absurdity of the town name of West, Texas. That’s correct, there’s a comma there. The name of the town is West. The state is Texas. It’s ridiculous. Do not name your town after a direction, folks. God will blow up your fertilizer factory and you’ll be effed in the West. Our thoughts go out to anyone hurt in the explosion, but next time check the name of your town before you move there.
Jeff gets started on a rant of his most hated commercial, the KFC “I ate the bones” campaign. Lately, everything from KFC pisses Jeff off, but this one just hit the limit. When you consider the premise of these spots, which assume people are so stupid that they’ll either: A.) have no idea what they’re ordering when they’re at the window or counter, and B.) will eat an entire meal without considering the contents of the processed, fried, ranch-dipped, monstrosities they’re shoveling in their maws. And then oh, shit… I ate the bones. No, you are an adult and you ordered chicken nuggets and ate them and you’re dumb. And I hate KFC’s marketing dept. You may ask, “You think you can do better?” Yes, KFC. I do think so.
Heck, anyone can. Just look at the ridiculousness of this bastardization which we once referred to as “chicken.” We give you Popeye’s Rip’n Chick’n, which is too damned good for vowels. In fact, it’s also more appetizing by a good stretch than it’s properly spelled version “Ripping Chicken.” Just let your mind chew on it for a bit and consider the visceral violence of ripping chickens, and then the crunchy, appetizing, dip-ability of Rip’n Chick’n. No contest. I took one for the team, ordered a Rip’n Chick’n at my neighborhood Popeyes and photographed the results.
Jeff eats a Popeye’s Rip’n Chick’n because he hates himself and functioning digestive tract.
So, there’s that… Matt takes it to the American ideal by announcing Buffalo Chikkin Paste. With dual plungers for your bleu cheese or dipping sauce accompaniment.
Mike’s topic comes from something he read from twitter. An advisor for the Occupy Wall Street movement is going to start helping out the Syrian Rebels. It’s a bad idea to go to Syria, where there’s a war, and try to apply the ideals of Occupy. Luckily, where the Occupy movement failed, ultimately due to the weather getting cold in New York, I hear Syria is quite warm. So they can camp out and poop in parking lots free of worry. I wouldn’t count on them getting any free sandwiches though. It’s hard enough being in Syria, without having to explain what the heck a sandwich is. Carne Ross was apparently born with that name, according to his wikipedia page.
Mike invents Bums Gone Fighting. Bums fighting the girls from Girls Gone Wild. Jeff likes a less violent version. The girls do an Extreme Makeover and manscape the bums. It’s a reality show hit!
Matt’s topic takes on fanaticism. The guys go deep and analyze the idea of being obsessed with something. There’s just being interested, but then there’s obsession. The obsession token takes on a couple shades of gray between love and just obsession. Mike points out it can go back and forth between the two and change over time.
Mike’s got an Inside Story around the 38min mark. He talks about visitation. How it works, what people go through. And eventually how he used to go to visitation events when Jose’s wife would be visiting. No porn in prison? No problem. Just find out when Jose’s wife is coming and invite your friends/family to come during the same time. Genius!
But when it comes to clothes, you don’t want to be a square and wear the clothes they give you. You really shouldn’t wear their socks or your feet will die. Fiberglass socks! Fuck that. You have to get some clothes. It’s one last kind of rebellion, comfort, and swag on the inside.
Stick around for a surprise after the end of the show. We actually went on to talk for another 10 minutes or so… the Rip’n Chick’n wouldn’t die and we took it a bit further. Here’s the photo we’re referencing, and the two memes we came up with.
Matt’s meme version of the photo – Alien reference.
Jeff’s meme entry with a little Avatar reference for those who lack HDTVs.
Coincidentally, both James Cameron references, if you count Aliens. And we’re out.
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